I recently sat down for coffee with Jeff Goins at Meridees Cafe’ in Franklin, Tennessee. Jeff’s profile includes being an author, speaker, and creative coach as well as the Director of Communications for Adventure in Missions.
I first became acquainted with Jeff about a year ago when I read one of his guest posts on Michael Hyatt’s blog.
At first glance, Jeff comes off as a relatively passive, easy-going person. Yet Jeff’s passion and energy for writing and for serving others is anything but passive.
To be honest, as I have become more acquainted with him and his blog, Jeff’s pointed rhetoric about pursuing one’s passion has provided a much needed kick in the rear.
In 2012 he released a powerful book, Wrecked: When a broken world slams into your comfortable life. Tens of thousands have purchased his books and e-books, enrolled in his online writing courses, and subscribed to his regular newsletters. He recently announced that he’ll be releasing a new book in 2013.
Jeff is single-handedly changing the world of writing for so many.
He gave me some great information during our time together, so I asked him if I could share our conversation with you.
Today I’m giving away 20 copies of Wrecked: When a broken world slams into your comfortable life. Keep the book or give it to a friend! You can find out more about the giveaway below.
Here’s my conversation with Jeff…
What’s your story?
My life has been — and is — a journey of becoming who I am. I’ve written my whole life but only recently started calling myself a writer.
For years, I dreamed of playing guitar with a band, but it only happened when I stepped out, despite my fear and apprehension, to do it.
Fear and insecurity are constants in my life. Those voices of discouragement don’t go away when I get closer to my calling; they get louder.
I’ve learned to embrace this and to step into uncomfortable situations, anyway. Somewhere, in the process, I’ve learned that a fulfilled life is one that makes room for others.
What was a defining moment in your career?
The day I decided to call myself a writer. It took my 27 years, but when I finally did it, everything changed. As it turns out, believing something about yourself is important to being able to do it.
What’s your best leadership advice?
Serve.
My best leadership experiences — of leading and being led — are ones of total commitment and service.
A leader’s job isn’t to bark orders or create organizational charts; it’s not control people or endlessly communicate. A leader’s job is to serve – to help people do what they do better.
What motivated you to write Wrecked?
I couldn’t find a book out there that addressed the issue I wanted to talk about.
There are a lot of books that tell you that you should help others and be more compassionate. But none that I could find talk about the other side of this activity — that it hurts, that there’s a cost. I’ve found that this cost is the secret to a fulfilled life — if you embrace it.
At what point did you realize that you were doing what you were made to do?
I still wonder this. I try to take it one day at a time. For instance, am I doing what I’m meant to do today?
Some days, that just means changing diapers and checking email. Others, it means leading a mission trip into the developing world. The challenge is to be present in all of it.
What is the greatest need for writers?
Writers are a funny, fickle bunch (myself included).
As I’ve set out to help writers, the biggest struggle I hear consistently is a lack of confidence. They know they’re meant to write but aren’t sure they can.
Like I said before, I can relate. It took me years to admit I was a writer, but once I did, it changed everything. I encourage other writers to make a similar declaration: to call themselves a writer, and then start acting like it. It often works.
What would you like to ask those who’ve read Wrecked?
Did it change you? Cause you to think differently? That’s my hope, anyway.
But if I were more realistic, I would ask: Do you now ask the question, “If I don’t do this, who will?” If you do, then I’ve done my job.
Free Book
I’m giving away 20 copies of Wrecked: When a broken world slams into your comfortable life. Here’s how you can get a copy for your self or for a friend:
- Leave a comment answering the question below. Include your mailing address in your comment.
- Then, Tweet a link to this post, or share it on Facebook. Use the hashtag #wrecked.
Are you impatient like me?! Then, download a FREE chapter by clicking here!
[It looks like we have 20 people – thanks for all the great feedback! The books will ship next week. Please allow a couple weeks for delivery.]
Question: What is the best way that you have found to grow as a leader? Share in the comments.
Disclosure: Some of the above links are affiliate links.
Michael, a wonderful book, thank you so much for sending me a copy last year. It’s such a great post and I have been fortunate to have worked with and alongside some great leaders as an employee and colleague and now as an executive coach, to work with and alongside so many great leaders every day. For me a great way to develop yourself as a leader, as well as by finding a mentor and coach to work with is to listen and learn from the daily interactions you have with your people. After as many interactions as possible, ask your self 1) What went well in that interaction? 2) What did I do to bring that about? 3) How could I do what I do to bring that success about more often? 4) What could have gone better for me and for them? 5) What would I have liked to have had happen? 6) What could I have done to bring that about? 7) What will I commit to doing next time when faced with that or a similar situation? 8) What difference will doing what I have identified make to myself and others? It is from these questions and my experience of answering these and from seeing others grow from answering them too, that I have seen the greatest impact on personal growth. Michael, if your offer of providing a couple of blogs for your readers still stands – I’d love to. Look forward to hearing from you. Stefan
Great to hear from you, Stefan. I appreciate your thoughtful comment. Shoot me an email about the blogs – we’ll work something out. Enjoy your week.
What I have found that helps me grow as a leader is to pray for God to bring difficult situations my way, and to help me be Christ-like in the midst of them.
For instance, asking for a way to live out my faith at work, and then having difficult conversations about the Church, praying for and trying to help a homeless guy that was at my workplace that was just to proud to ask for help.
When we encounter broken situations, they call us to live to the standard that we profess is Christlike. Then it draws out the evil reactions, intentions, attitudes of the hearts (I’ve thought some pretty selfish and evil things in hard situations), and it encourages and strengthens other aspects of our Christlikeness. Christ is the archetypal leader, do what he did and you’re sure to grow as a leader. In all things a high Christology will never let you down.
Thanks Tyler – I appreciate your perspective.
Jeff is a wonderful example of servant leadership. To answer your question I found a combination of practice, hands on experience, and personal growth(reading, conferences, audio lessons, and mentorship) are some of the best ways to grow and become an expert. My email address is danblackonleadership@gmail.com
Thanks Dan. I agree – each of these areas contribute significantly to leadership development.
Jeff’s a great inspiration. Seeing his rise from an unknown blogger to the status he now holds is heartening.
He’s been very intentional and focused – and he’s been generous to so many.
Great interview and great book. ” A fulfilled life is one that makes room for others” I’m learning this more & more everyday.
I am too – thanks Eileen!
I already have the book – and it is awesome…found Jeff via Michael Hyatt’s blog and love what he is putting out there. The best way to grow I have found to grow as a leader is to make things less about me and more about others.
Less of me and more of others – challenging but rewarding!
I never thought I had the capability of being a leader, until I started picking up on small hints of movement by others around me. What I mean to say is, once people start spending more time around you and “feel” what passion you have for things, all of a sudden, they start to uncover some of their own passions and deep underground desires.
Sometimes the smallest things encourage others to make a bigger move in their own life. For example, I go to school full-time and work full-time, and some people I work with believe I’m crazy in the head, but I know that the reason I run on coffee and trail mix for meals some nights of the week is because I believe I am capable of becoming great and different.
So I’ve told a few people who have expressed interest in other art forms like fashion or even writing themselves, to go create change in your own life. Nobody is going to do it for you, and plus the reward of finishing something (just like writing a little every day adds up), will give you incentive to keep doing more projects.
I loved this interview. I briefly had a small e-mail chat with Jeff about taking risks in writing about a week ago. I believe the best medicine to being a leader is to say: “Why not? You could do that.” Sometimes people just need to hear permission to run wild. Thank you for this interview! Happy New Year, everyone!
P.S. Would it be acceptable to message you my address on Twitter/e-mail? Just for safety reasons. 🙂 Thank you again for this opportunity!
Thanks for your thoughtful response Desiree. I appreciate your passion and focus.
Enjoyed it! Thanks so much for your consistent encouragement to so many.
I grow best as a leader by listening.
Sheldon Curry
9280 East Summer Trail
Tucson, AZ 85749
Thanks Sheldon!
The way I’ve learned to grow as a leader is through teachability, humility, and gleaning behind the great leaders God has placed in my path.
Thanks for connecting Melinda. Happy New Year!
The way I’ve learned to grow as a leader is to practice humility. Understanding that I am not the best, most mature, or perfect pushes me in the direction of learning to improve. It’s difficult to accept the teaching from others if I think I have everything figured out. Trying to lead in humility has given me permission to ask for help and it has helped me to work outside the box because failure isn’t life ending.
Thanks for the great interview!
1218 NE 102nd Ct.
Kansas City, MO 64155
So many leaders are ready and willing to help – if they are asked. Thanks for connecting!
Thanks for the interview gentlemen. I think recognizing that you have something to give is the first step in leadership. Leadership is a combination of things but humility and a spirit of service are the two that come to mind. I’m with Leslie Monroe on the whole “leaving my address here” thing. I can be reached at info@hondurasliving.com
Thanks Kimberley!
Best way to grow as a leader? Serve others. Put aside any fears and do what is needed when it is needed.
232 Ferrell Ave
Ashland, OH 44805
Yep – leaders serve – theme for the day!
The best way I’ve found to lead, I learned through parenting. The hardest thing about parenting is letting go and that’s one of the most important things about leadership. Allowing those you’re leading to learn through trial and error and eventually do things their own way and be the people they are meant to be.
And to Jeff – about Wrecked – It did change me. I read it at the most fitting time in my life. I had been caring for my dad, who was dying from pancreatic cancer. He passed away on the 16th of December and I was there for him for a year until his last day. There were so many times I didn’t want to watch him suffer and I wanted to escape, but I’m glad I didn’t “rush past those messy & uncomfortable moments” that teach us mercy and I was there to help him until the end. I’m sure your book has changed plenty of people.
I do have it on kindle, so no need to count me in the contest unless it’s for a hard copy, thanks! 🙂
Thanks so much for connecting Denise. I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for your transparency. You have encouraged me.
The best way I found to grow as a leader to is to be open and transparent to the people in my group. I want other men in my group to see that I, too, will fail at things but instead of wallowing in my gulit and hurt I let God’s grace be evident to them.
Brian Tooley
751 Chardonnay Place
Hemet, CA 92544
I agree – transparency and authenticity goes a long way.
The best way I found to grow as a leader to is to be open and transparent to the people in my group. If I do that then I will grow with the other people in my group.
Brian Tooley
751 Chardonnay Place
Hemet, CA 92544
I have found, it’s best to lead by example. So I have had to grow by serving others. Would love a copy of Wrecked! I’m not crazy about leaving my address, but here’s my email: lfmonroe@gmail (dot) com let me know if I win!
Thanks Leslie!
Best way to grow as a leader…….is to serve.
Yep!
The best way I have found to grow as a leader has to be through Honor and creating a culture/ethos of Honor. That is, helping others to step fully into what is their best work, even if it means being or becoming a leader in your own area.
Good thoughts Justin. Thanks my friend.
Great post, Michael. Jeff has been a big inspiration to me as well. I think we grow when we are pushing ourselves outside of our comfort zone as well as when we are serving others.
Yes – leading requires us to live and work in discomfort. I’ve learned to be comfortable with discomfort. 😉
Fail and try again, taking responsibility for the failure as you go. People begin to see that you are willing to try, that their own failures will be worked through, and that you are the person who can figure out how to get it right, eventually…
Doug Hibbard
PO Box 182
Almyra, AR 72003
True. Taking responsibility for failure is an important discipline – many struggle with it.
The best way I have learned to grow as a leader is to get
your hands dirty. You have to get involved and do. It has been a process to
learn who I am; the good and the bad. I have to being willing to challenge the
process. Things change and you have to change with them without losing your principles.
Most of all you have to weed through all the criticism and praises to stay
focused on your God given mission.
7456 Shortall St
Chestertown, MD 21620
I agree Randy – love your perspective!
Michael – you and I have discussed once or twice previously but being in a career within Higher Education my whole job is about leadership and I learn more and more about myself each day. Whether its leading my group through StrengthsFinder (this will happen at tomorrows retreat), teaching a leadership course to students, reading many books like Maxwell, Collins, etc., reading blogs like yours and of course Michael Hyatt’s, listening to podcast while I run (I recommend Dave Ramsey) or attending course as I continue to finish my PhD. The avenues are endless in this day and age.
Michael – Little fact about Jeff when I interacted with him, he was a RA in college. I think there is a lot to be said for people who lead their peers especially in college. I know it was challenging when I did was a RA.
University of Northern Colorado
199 Tobey Kendel Hall
CB 38
Greeley, CO 80634
So true Chris. I appreciate your supportive spirit in leading your team.
Cool connection with Jeff!
Debra Webb
1015 fiddler creek way
Lexington, KY 40515
being in and staying in an intimate Lover and Beloved Sacred Union intimacy with God 24/7. praying and living in the 23rd Psalm, the Lord’s Prayer also called the Our Father, the Beattitudes and the teachings of Jesus including the greatest commandments spoken by Jesus of loving God, yourself and others.
God’s blessings from Debra
A meaningful relationship with God is important. Thanks Debra!
thank you for the nice comment and for your original invitation from Twitter.com! great people and resources! God’s blessings!
My pleasure, my friend. Let me know how I can serve you.
I agree, David. Reacting derails many conversations and initiatives. Leaders prepare for challenges ahead of time.
I have found that being in fellowship with other men that are committed to serving and making a difference in the lives of others a powerful and effective way to grow as a leader. It truly energized me and when I face challenging situations I can receive guidance that will provide me with assistance to improve as a leader.
Brent Lockwood
11801 Sherbourne Drive
Timonium, MD 21093
Yes – Leaders are continually being mentored and mentoring others.
Living the philosophy I learned from Zig Ziglar, “You can have everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want.” This works because as you are sincerely looking for ways and finding them to help others get what they want you will grow as well, often in unexpected or seemingly unrelated areas of your own life. As others see you leading by example your own leadership value increases. Staying motivated is the key and listening to recording, reading books and blogs of those you want to emulate or be more like help you to stay motivated and get you through the down times.
I would love to read “Wrecked.” It sounds like one of the books that will help anyone continue on their journey. 405 County Road 559, Enterprise, AL 36330
I agree Stan – great leaders serve.
I lead best when I trust my instinct. 99% of the time it’s the right thing to do and when it’s not, I admit my mistake and what I learned from it. Give up control and allow yourself to be led by the Holy Spirit. For the last 4 years I have attended the Willow Creek Leadership Summit and every year it kicks me in the heart. Great practical advice and motivation for leaders. Laurie Broderick – 66A Sagamore Hill Drive, Port Washington, NY 11050
Thanks Laurie! I love what Bill and Willow Creek are doing with the Summit.
I enjoyed the post. Thank you.
Question: What is the best way that you have found to grow as a leader?
Listen.
Listening helps leaders check in on the reality of the organization’s mission. What are people doing day to day to fulfill the mission? Do people really believe in the vision? Does the vision need to change? Is the vision missing something? What can this person I am talking to add to the vision?
3256 Tallahassee Dr. Cincinnati, OH 45239
Listening is a critical discipline for leaders. Thanks Michael.
I received my Wrecked book in the mail. Thank you!
I look forward to reading it soon.
Perfect!
I grow best, when I can serve others or I can find intentional mentors. Who are willing to offer me critically feedback. Reading blogs, and books on leadership also help
9457 bluff lake , Zeeland mi 49464
Me too, Dave. I am intentional about connecting with leaders and mentors.
I have found that being in fellowship with other men that are committed to serving and making a difference in the lives of others a powerful and effective way to grow as a leader. It truly energized me and when I face challenging situations I can receive guidance that will provide me with assistance to improve as a leader.
Brent
This seems to be a theme today – leaders are continually growing through healthy relationships. Thanks for connecting.
Excellent post. The best way that I have found to grow as a leader is to fulfill my God given purpose. My purpose is to encourage, equip and empower individuals to realize and live their God designed purpose. I grow as a leader when I help others grow as a leader. 3740 Falls Tr., Winston, GA 30187
Love your purpose – and that you are intentionally living it out.
Great post.
Growing as a leader; I am always challenged to read, be mentored by someone who is further down the road than me, and walk by faith and not sight.
markm@daybreakdev.org
P.S Years ago I knew Meridee. She was a delightful person.
All great disciplines, Mark. Happy New Year, my friend.
The best way to grow as a leader is to become a servant and lead by example. Lead by how you live as well as by what you learn as a leader. Through your being a servant to others you will learn from them and as a result improve your leadership skills – learning what works and what doesn’t and how different personalities relate to different leadership styles. Leadership is not a “one size fits all” venture but rather a leader is ever changing, adapting and developing new and better ways to lead. These are my thoughts about leadership. Harold Cameron, HaroldSays, 333 Maple Lake Road, #1A, Springbrook Township, PA 18444
I appreciate your thoughtful response, Harold. I am grateful for those who modeled adaptive leadership for me.
A wonderful post – thank you for sharing. Question: What is the best way that you have found to grow as a leader? Answer: The combination of experience over time and the 1000’s of interactions I have had, coupled with 1) a deep seated desire to understand why I and others have acted in a particular way rather than taking both positively and negatively perceived behaviour at face value. This has led to a greater understanding and ability to empathise, communicate and support those I work with and lead and 2) choosing to be open to and consciously applying the lessons I have learned along the way, both from the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ examples I have observed in my life. Here during the periods of greatest growth I have reviewed every interaction no matter how big or how small, considering two elements 1) What did I do well including a) What did I do to bring that about b) How/where else could I use the success and approach I have just used to see even greater success and 2) What could have gone better? including a) What would I liked to have happened? b) What could I have done to bring that about? c) Going forward what will I do when faced with the same or a similar situation?
The act of completing this review has enabled significant growth and is something I have used and advocated to great benefit with most of those I have worked with. I hope that you find my comment of interest and would love to be considered for a copy of Jeff Goins book.
Many thanks once again
Stefan E-mail: stefanpowell@pinionperformance.com
Thanks Stefan. Love the thought that we can learn from both good and bad examples.
In a world filled with increasing distraction, ‘being present’ can be a quite a challenge. I However, I have found that others (most importantly my family) know when I am present and when I am not. They are acutely aware whether I am succumbing to distraction or sharing in their experience. I think that our most difficult trials are what bring us back to what is and should be most important.
Conor Cusack
33 Marwood Road
Rochester, NY 14616
So true, Conor – I am continually working on “being present”.
The best way I have learned to grow as a leader is to help a visionary to carry out his vision. Will Curtis 2395 Giles Drive Christiansburg, VA 24073
Yep – great leaders grow by serving others.
I think the first thing I find most helpful as a leader is understanding myself and the how and why I do things. The second is understanding the discernible patterns of behavior in others so that I can lead them effectively.
Love the thought – understanding the discernible patterns of behavior in others so that I can lead them effectively. Trust you are doing well. Happy New Year.
Huge fan of Jeff Goins! He is an inspiring writer with a HUGE passion for God. I haven’t read his book and would love to. The think I like the best about Jeff’s writing is that it’s all designed to help people, which is one of my passions.
Could not agree more!
Wow, Michael! I too hope to one day share a cup of coffee with Jeff. In a sense, that’s what I’ve learned is the best way to grow as a leader.
Not meeting Jeff Goins at a coffee shop, but being bold enough to reach out to other leaders and simply introduce myself in an effort to build a relationship and learn from their knowledge and wisdom.
I agree Chad – it’s the reason I love spending time with you and learning from you! Happy New Year, my friend.