Today, you will make one fundamental decision that will singularly determine the outcome of your day.
You made the same decision yesterday. And the day before. In fact, you have made this one decision every day of your career.
At some point every day you decide…
…if you are going to set your own priorities or allow someone or something else to set them for you.
When priorities are set for you…
- You struggle to stay motivated.
- You lack of focus because priorities are changed frequently.
- Your life and work feel empty and aimless because you aren’t consistently working in areas of your passion.
- You find yourself overcompensating in areas where your skill and experience are constrained.
- You experience frustration because priorities that are set for you are at odds with your vision and passion.
Let’s face it – you become a victim of your environment.
Can’t help it
Last week, I read an article about 10 things leaders in a particular industry hate most about their jobs. These leaders listed working 6 to 7 days a week as one of the things they dislike most about their work.
At the end of the article, many of these same leaders commented that although they despise working long days and weekends, the nature of their work demands it. So they have learned to cope with this unfortunate reality.
Sometimes, I can get out of the office and go home; other times, I can’t. Some weeks, there’s just too much going on.
One wife commented:
I can’t help but chuckle at the phrase “day off”. It’s a rare occasion for my husband to have even one day off, and it’s never the same day from week to week.
The choice
Reading through the comments, I realized – It’s never occurred to these people that they have chosen to place a higher priority on their work than their home, family, and friends.
The truth is, very few employers require team members to work 50, 60, 70 hours a week. And if an employer does require it, no one is forcing you or me to continue working there. We choose to.
Yet, work days get longer. And time for rest and health gets shorter.
Here’s the irony – We trick ourselves into thinking that, if we work fewer hours, projects will fall through the cracks, performance will suffer, and we’ll lose our job.
It matters
If you (and your schedule) are controlled by what you do, you have made a choice to allow it. And that’s inexcusable.
Because your life and work matter. A lot! They matter far too much to be dragged along by chance – by whatever happens today.
When YOU set your priorities…
- You create margin for people – especially those who are most important to you.
- You’re able to manage your own schedule – rather than it managing you.
- You can focus on pursuing these top priorities in your life and work.
The ability to choose your own priorities is empowering. It’s energizing. It’s enlivening.
Consider these questions –
- Have you clearly defined your top priorities?
- Have you created a personal life plan to help you with life and work balance?
- Did you write out your vision for your career or organization?
- Do you have enough margin time – enough time off – to give to these top priorities? If not, your present situation is not sustainable.
Take a few minutes to read the articles linked in the questions above. Choose one of the questions to begin working on this week.
Making the effort to clarify and establish your priorities will significantly impact your life, your work, and your relationships. Your employer will forget the many hours you put in, but your family & friends will never forget memory-making moments.
I’m so committed to helping you succeed in your life and work that we developed the SIMPLE Personal Life Plan Guide and Template just for you! I want you to enjoy the freedom and clarity that comes from identifying your top priorities and I want you to avoid the struggles that I faced personally.
Once you download it and try it out, shoot me an email. You can even send me your draft to review for you. I’m looking forward to hearing about the dramatic improvements to your life and work.
I like your point about creating margin for people, that’s really important in my life. The other day we had some unexpected guests who ended up staying for about 4 hours. Thankfully, we had prioritized and were able to just relax and enjoy our time with them. After they left I told my wife how great it was that we were stressed out thinking, “when will they leave” and didn’t have to ask them to leave because of something else we had scheduled.
Making time for relationships in our chaotic schedules is important. Glad you were able to do that!
Thanks for sharing these great insights, Michael. I too have spent my career facilitating personal and organizational growth, and continue to — as a daily priority choice of course! And I couldn’t agree more with your assessment and prompts.
Thanks Hal! I appreciate your feedback and encouragement!
Great post Michael. What keeps me from setting priorities is urgency. What I mean is other people’s urgency pushes me into adopting their priorities.
I just have to be aware of it and not let it happen!
Yes – learning to protect our time and priorities in a way that allows you to still serve others is key.
I recently set some boundaries regarding the hours I put in. I went from about 70 to no more than 55. That seems to be a sweet spot where I can get my work done and still have a family that recognizes me. Great reminders, Michael – I’ll be pointing folks here.
Glad to see you are making intentional progress on balancing work and family!
Awesome post Michael. We need to know what’s important to us and then set our priorities around those activities that further those things.
Thanks Joe! I agree!
The key (in both success and failure), in my experience, is routines. When I have routines of setting priorities, and reviewing them daily, I accomplish what I set out to do – most important things first. When I fail in setting or reviewing on a consistent basis, I flounder.
Good point, Graham. I think you’re right – I have a routine of planning my week each Sunday. So yesterday I listed everything I need to accomplish this week and prioritized the list. It makes the week go more smoothly.
Then it is no surprise to me that you accomplish your goals. 🙂
This is a great post Michael. It speaks to something I have been working on personally and reading about in “Eat That Frog”. I am battling with a significant other right now (okay not battling, but struggling) – and the issue is working 15 hour days all of the time, leaving little time for our relationship.
Meanwhile, I am learning how to do just this – prioritize. I don’t have trouble spending time with my family – they demand it right now by the nature of where their lives are (4 granddaughters under 1 year old). My problem is trying to fit that into working full time and building a consulting business on the side. I’m getting better. Your post has a lot of great tips! I hope it reaches many!
Wow! 4 granddaughters under 1! I thought I had my hands full with a daughter and 1 year old son (at my age).
I do understand what you mean about trying to fit everything in. I appreciate your encouragement!
there’s a set of twins in there (turning 1 tomorrow) – I would not trade my time with them for anything! As for your son, wait till he’s 2!
I love this Michael! It is such validation for the choices I’ve made over the last few years. I walked away from a very successful career in real estate to do what I love… spend more time with my kids and follow a dream that was uncovered while completing my life plan.
In fact, I’m delivering a keynote on Wednesday about this very topic… it’s called Loving the Journey. You can’t live your best life until you’ve done two things: 1)identified and stack-ranked what is most important to you, and 2) live according to that hierarchy. Until you do that, you’re living to other people’s (employer’s) expectations. And that’s no way to live!
Well-said Lisa! I love your story. And I’m glad you’re living it. Enjoy the journey.