I am on vacation with family for a couple of weeks and will be posting occasionally. Though I have limited access to email and social media, I look forward to reconnecting and resuming my regular posting schedule when I return. If you would like to guest post in the future, please contact me.
Life is a series of new beginnings. One chapter closes – and another opens – over and over. Which means that you and I periodically encounter seasons of transition.
You know what I’m talking about. Because you’ve been through it. Depending on the circumstances leading up to the transition, it’s natural to focus on the crisis, the pain, challenging circumstances. It’s all too easy to assign blame, point fingers, and ask why me.
These behaviors have little value and almost never help the situation. Let’s face it, we really can’t do much about the transition anyway – it’s going to happen one way or another.
Instead of being consumed with the uncontrollable, those facing transition are better served when they focus on these 3 disciplines:
1. Health
Transitions can bring on a state of emotional emptiness. In crisis we become reactionary, testy, and inconsiderate.
You know there’s a problem when you’re on your way home from work and you consciously hope that your spouse has everything under control and the kids don’t need much from you. You simply don’t have any more to give to the most valued people in your life.
These feelings of inadequacy, emptiness, and failure are understandable. Because you cannot directly control how you feel.
Emotional health is the byproduct of your physical, mental and spiritual health. Trouble in one or more of these 3 areas directly effects your emotions. For more on this, read my post, 4 Critical Gauges for Your Life and Work.
Transitions offer the perfect opportunity to reset. As you turn a page and move into a new chapter of life, evaluate your health. You have so much more to offer than a handful of years of frenzied activity.
2. Relationships
Whether your facing a job termination, dealing with an unexpected diagnosis, or grieving the loss of a loved one, transitions allow you to reconnect in meaningful ways with those who are deeply invested in your life. Spend time with those closest to you – family, close friends, supportive colleagues. Live in the moment.
Sure you’ll need to address the logistics of the transition – but resist the urge to procrastinate, worry, or fear. Request the help of friends and family. Spend time with encouraging people. These relationships will be forever improved through this season of transition.
3. What can be learned
Make note of your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors as you navigate the transition. Evaluate how you deal with each. And identify key areas that will help you through your next transition. Because sooner or later, you’ll face another.
Transitions can bring about dramatic improvements in your life and work. And I’ve seen transitions derail many who were not prepared to navigate transition.
The best time to make a decision is before you have to. So decide today to give plenty of attention to these 3 areas – and let the rest take care of itself.
Question: Think back to your last transition – how did you deal with it? What did you learn through it? Share your experience in the comments.
Yousra Sabber says
Life is a series of new beginnings. One chapter closes – and another opens – over and over. Which means that you and I periodically encounter seasons of transition lovely tnx :))
Michael Nichols says
Thanks, Yousra. I appreciate your encouragement. Enjoy your weekend.
Yousra Sabber says
Life is a series of new beginnings. One chapter closes – and another opens – over and over. Which means that you and I periodically encounter seasons of transition. lovely Tnx
Mark says
This is a very helpful post to me, Michael.
I am going through what is probably the darkest period of my
life right now and what you wrote here is so true. I would add that its also
important to focus on what we want now, or on the other side of the transition.
Our tendency is to look back with regret or shame.
Exercise, relationships, and journaling (prayerfully) what
can be learned have been crucial to me progressing through my transition. Your
post reminds me how important it is that I maintain these disciplines moving
forward. Thank you!
Michael Nichols says
Thanks so much for your note Mark – I’ve been there. As our family has gone through significant transitions, these
disciplines have allowed us to continue to grow and lead through the
transition.
Love your thought about focusing on what you want. My wife
and I generally make a list of wants and don’t wants. We have developed a tool to help us
make significant decisions. I plan to write a couple of posts and make
these tools available.
If you don’t already have it, I’d like to send you a copy of
a book, Great Leaders GROW. Email your shipping address and I’ll get it out to
you.
Let me know how I can serve you.
Michael Nichols says
I can relate David. Thanks for sharing your experiences.
Katie says
These are really smart tips. I 100% agree with you here, and especially like the point about ‘Health’… it makes such an impact on all parts of your life if you just take care of yourself. The benefits of being healthy are immeasurable. I have found, consistently, I am able to deal with transition in my life much easier if I watch my health.
Great post, thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Michael Nichols says
You’re right, Katie! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!