This post is part of the series – That Was Awkward
That Was Awkward – Decision-Making
That Was Awkward – Leading
If you’re ever going to accomplish anything worthwhile, you’ll have to be willing to feel awkward. What you’re doing will seem foolish at times – to yourself and to others. The truth is – you’re never going to be more than 80% sure. So the awkward feeling is natural.
You might as well go ahead and decide. Don’t put it off any longer. Make the decision.
Great leaders start by clarifying their bold, compelling vision. First for themselves, then together with others. And they don’t expect everyone to get excited about their excitement.
Why? Your intensity often confronts the passivity of others.
Get ready
Some people will be inspired by your vision. They’ll buy in and they’ll take ownership. They’ll champion the cause and support it all along the way. Others will be intimidated and mask their discomfort with criticism.
And criticism is a mask for a fragile ego – because people criticize what they don’t like about themselves. So, prep yourself for it now!
I have chosen to invest significant time and energy in numerous projects and initiatives which appeared foolish to many. And I’ll admit, some of them were foolish. But most of them weren’t – and they worked.
I grew. The team grew. The organization grew.
Remember – what is lauded as brilliance after the fact often feels like foolishness in the moment.
It doesn’t always make sense
Several years ago I overheard a well-respected administrator caution a young leader, “You’re often way ahead of people in your thinking. You should consider slowing down a little.” He was trying to save the guy some grief. But the administrator was really saying that the new leader looked foolish sometimes.
Your vision and passion won’t always make logical sense to others. Some people will even tell you so.
But that’s ok! Decide now – you’re going to live out your purpose and vision with passion – even if it means embarrassing yourself in the process.
Why do we care?
What if we didn’t mind the awkward moments? Would it change the way we approach our life and work?
What decision have you been delaying because it’s going to seem foolish to those around you?
We all obsess over decision-making. To help me keep moving forward, I regularly remind myself – everything is an experiment. This has become a guiding principle for me. And if everything is an experiment, then when things don’t go as planned, it’s not failure. We simply tried something and it didn’t work. Now we know it won’t work that way and we can try something else.
I have a huge vision for my life, my work, my family – and sometimes I’m going to look a little foolish. So what?
Identity crisis
Discovering my passion and living out my vision have required me to make myself extremely vulnerable – to my family, to my team, to my leaders.
This is not easy to do – I’ve had to get rid of things that I found my identity in. And you’ll feel like you’re losing yourself in the process. But it is only in losing yourself for the benefit others that you truly find yourself.
To be most effective in your life and work, make the success of others your top priority. Yes, there will be times that people take advantage of you. But more often, they will place high value on your transparency and authenticity. And if they don’t – that’s ok too. It was an experiment.
What is it that you find your identity in – that you have gripped so tightly that God himself could not pry from your grasp?
It’s time to loosen up. Stick your neck out. Make the leap. Take the plunge. Go out on a limb – that’s where the fruit is anyway!
It may seem a little weird. You may feel awkward. Others will call you foolish. But its worth it!
How do you balance your passion and those awkward moments? Share in the comments.
Michael Nichols
Dan Nelson says
Amazing! Many of the points made here I have implemented or discussed with my college roommate last night. One day I will use these skills to ask a girl out.
Michael Nichols says
Thanks for your thoughts here! Glad you enjoyed the article.
shavonnah says
Good article!
Michael Nichols says
Thanks Shavonnah. Enjoy your week!